


just like you

by kwritten



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-11
Updated: 2014-04-11
Packaged: 2018-01-19 01:01:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1449493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kwritten/pseuds/kwritten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>prompt: btvs, dawn + buffy, if she gets a black eye, I want a black eye. if she gets a splinter, I want a splinter, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	just like you

_No, Mom! I want it to be shorter!  
This is so cute, just try it on.  
It isn't _right _.  
Dawn, we've been to every store in the mall, what's wrong with it.  
It isn't like Buffy's! I want it to be like Buffy's!_

 

 

In the back of her closet were a pair of purple hightops. In the back of her bottom drawer, a sequined jean vest. Pinned to the top of her bulletin board a picture of them on the first day of school, in the same outfit. Buffy leaning down with her arm around Dawn's shoulders (they lean the other way now) a bright smile on her face. And in her mother's even handwriting, _Dawn - First Grade_.

 

Some things you save and some things you leave behind.  
Some things change no matter how tightly you hold on to them.

 

_Dawn, really. Don't you think it's time you threw this old stuff away?  
It's not garbage, mom.  
They don't fit you anymore!  
I can't move to a new house without them.  
It might be good for us to downsize, sweetie.  
Memories aren't garbage.  
I'll get another box for you then._

 

 

(Buffy didn't argue. She threw out more than she took with her. As if that could save them all. Dawn squirreled away as much as she could sneak past her distracted mother's worried gaze.

Buffy may have felt comfortable throwing away parts of herself, but Dawn clings to the scraps because her world is slipping away.

Some days, sitting in her room in a pile of discarded clothes, she wonders what is the difference.)

 

 

_Where are you going?  
Shh! Dawn go back to bed.  
Can I come with you?  
No. I have... please go back to bed.  
Is this a Slayer thing?  
No. Yes. **No.** Please just...  
I can help! I have been practicing!  
Practicing?!  
Yeah. I keep a stake under my bed and I practice when mom thinks I'm asleep.  
And you think you're pretty good?  
I'm ready!  
Okay. Then I have a very important job for you, okay?  
Really?!  
Really.  
Whatisitwhatisit?  
I need you to take your stake and watch mom's room and make sure no vamps sneak into the house.  
...  
Do you think you can do that?  
I can be so brave, you just watch!  
I believe you. I gotta go, okay?  
I'll be brave, just like you._

 

 

When she watched her life burn to ashes before her eyes, she felt the most satisfying sense of accomplishment. Those words, written by a child, she was bound to outgrow them anyway. It almost felt like a relief to throw it all away.

 

 

(Her secret discards were kept, because they seemed more true now in the end. A girl made of blood and magic sitting in a pile of someone else's garbage.

Just part of the collection.)

 

 

 

_Promise me something?  
What's that?  
When we get to the end...  
Don't talk like that.  
No. Fuck. Listen.  
Watch your language.  
You're not my mother.  
...  
Sorry.  
No. Okay... what?  
Promise you won't send me away. Promise you won't try to say goodbye.   
Okay. I promise.  
No you don't. You'll do it anyway. I'm just letting you know now that I'll hold it against you.  
Dawn...  
Save it for your troops, General._

 

 

 

In the end, they broke all the promises they ever made to each other. That's how it works.

Because when you are back to back with a sword in your hand and the world has already ended more times than you can count... what's the difference?

 

 

_Mom? Does love hurt?  
What makes you think that, honey?  
Because Buffy cries all the time and she says she's in love and I think that maybe that means love hurts.  
Well. Sometimes the people you love can hurt you.  
Like when Buffy pushed me off the porch that time?  
Sort of...   
Or like when dad left?  
Why do you want to know this?  
Because I want to be ready. I want to be in love like Buffy is and I need to know how it works._

 

_So that I'll know it's real._

 

 

She remembers being a kid and looking up with wide-eyed wonder at her sister. Buffy didn't have to be a Slayer to be a superhero. She was more real than anything Dawn experienced.

 

Ain't it awful when you grow up and realize you were right all along?

 

 

 

_Dawn, are you alright?!  
I'm a little bloody I think.  
Why did you do that?  
Do what?  
I ... Dawn you crashed your bike into that tree.  
I know.  
Did you do it on purpose?  
Do you think I got a bruise?  
Maybe...  
Okay.  
Did you want to?  
Buffy had one on her leg this morning. I saw it when she got out of the shower. It was so big and purple. Mommy, aren't bruises pretty? Do you think mine will be as pretty as hers? I want it to be just the same._

 

 

 

 

She takes in nice and slow and smiles down at him with ease. He’s so adoring, he’s so precious, she made him wait a long time.

It was a longer hunt than she’s used to.

She rides him and he grabs at her waist and she smiles thinking of the bruises that she’ll bear in the morning.

“Babe you are something else,” he says just as his face changes and she smiles down at him.  
“Well look at that, so are you.”

He is dust between her legs before he even sees the stake in her hands.

 

 

(I got your bruises and your armor, too.)


End file.
